The Best Meeting for Newcomers: Big Book Study
If you're new to AA or just moved to Charlotte, the best type of meetings to attend are Big Book studies. Here's why.
People who show up to a Big Book study on a weekday night are serious about recovery. They're giving up Monday Night Football, the latest Netflix series, or whatever else they could be doing at home. These folks are there for one reason: to study the precise instructions for getting sober contained in the first 164 pages of Alcoholics Anonymous.
Why Big Book Studies Work Better
At Big Book studies, you'll find more people than average who have worked the steps and are willing to sponsor. Just because someone's at a Big Book study doesn't mean they actually know the program, but these meetings tend to attract people who are more dedicated to working the steps as they're laid out in the book.
This isn't to say other meetings are bad:
Speaker meetings are great for new folks because there's no pressure to share - you can blend into the crowd and really relate to somebody's long-form story. Many of us have heard speakers tell our story from the podium, saying exactly what we needed to hear. However, being totally anonymous in AA ironically isn't the best thing. You do want people to get to know you. So if you go to a speaker meeting, like all meetings, show up early to get to know some folks.
Discussion meetings can vary wildly. You might hear something that changes your life, or you might hear a lot of opinions but not much about the actual program.
12 & 12 studies are also solid choices. The Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions expands on the program of recovery and can be particularly helpful after you've been through the Big Book.
Here's the thing: every type of meeting has its place, but you're going to hear all sorts of crazy stuff at meetings. Some of it might sound pretty good, but it might not have much basis in reality or might not be coming from somebody who has it all together.
When you're new, you don't have any basis for discernment about what's good advice and what's nonsense. That's why you need a sponsor to take you through the steps and show you how to work the AA program. Your sponsor helps you sort through what you hear and focus on what actually works.
Big Book studies just tend to have more people who know how to do that.
Meetings to Approach with Caution
Not all literature studies are created equal. Living Sober meetings and Plain Language Big Book studies, while well-intentioned, generally aren't where you'll find strong sponsorship or solid program knowledge. If you're serious about getting sober, stick to the original text.
The Bottom Line
When I was new, I needed clear instructions, not just fellowship. I needed a sponsor who knew the program, not just someone who'd been around a while. I needed the solution, not just discussion about the problem.
My experience has been that Big Book study meetings are where I found people who could show me how to work the steps. Committing to one meeting weekly, finding someone who had what I wanted, and asking them to sponsor me - that's what worked for me.
Your path might be different, but if you're looking for solid program knowledge and available sponsors, Big Book studies are a good place to start.
That's how I got sober. Maybe it'll work for you too.
Two examples of solid Big Book study meetings in the Charlotte area are the Huntersville 164 South Group (Mondays at 7:00 PM) and the St. Augustine Men's Group (Thursdays at 7:00 PM) - both study the program as it was originally written. You can find times, locations, and directions on our meeting schedule.